My first

I am just a normal guy who has died a few times and gotten better. I served in the United States Air Force until 1998 when, after 17 years, they decided to kick me for something that I had told them at the beginning: I'm gay. It was a knee jerk reaction by DOD to the president writing Don't Ask/Don't Tell. That document ended more careers then the so called "which hunts" ever did. I don't understand politics and in my opinion that is a good thing.

The most life changing event I have so far experienced was my death in 2013. I was thrown from the second floor of my apartment and landed head first on the brick floor below. I have life today because of two reasons. One is the brilliance of the medical team at the University of New Mexico Hospital lead by Dr. Tabe. The other was my complete lack of medical knowledge. I did not know that my injuries should have killed me so I refused to stay dead. I had an extensive rebuild of my chest and head. I have very few real memories of anything prior to June the 21st, 2013. The doctors originally wanted to do the operations over an entire year but I forced them to complete me in just under a month, I wanted to get back to school! That was a bust because my mind had been rearranged. Things I was good at before I could no longer do. Math has been taken away from me. I used to volunteer as a cooking instructor through the Department of Justice's Weed and Seed program and I have lost the ability to explain what I am doing. I can still cook, excellently, but I can't explain what I am doing. I think of it as muscle memory, my body remembers and just does.

When I left the hospital I remember the nurse telling me to go with this very nice lady because she was my mother. She became my number one advocate and defender. When she died in 2016 I went crazy. I hated everyone and everything that I perceived as taking her away from me. I ended up homeless and lost until a very nice Albuquerque Police Department man found me. I had been beaten several times so he took me in for repairs. He, also, told me about the Good Shepherd. I did not know that there were places I could go to get food and to sleep.

This is only part of a much larger story. I have left things out for the purpose of brevity but I will expand later on.

I have a hard time relating to humans.  Its like when they were rebuilding me that left some parts out. If you have never met a person who has suffered a severe traumatic brain injury then you may not know that one of the common side effects is extreme irritability. That is what the doctors call it but it does not begin to explain what happens. Imagine someone bumping in to you and your first thought is to launch nuclear weapons at them and you may begin to understand what it means to befriend a TBI survivor. So I have few friends to say the least.

Thank you for your time.